That Friday Feeling...

Positive Mental Attitude is on the life menu at the moment!

I am feeling really great about life!

I am back on the wagon and looks like it will be a great loss for Monday's weigh in (yes I know I am not meant to sneak peek! Lol).

We had our great news yesterday regarding finally getting Clomid.

To top this week off it is a long Bank Holiday weekend, so no work for 3 days! Yay!

Life is good xx

On the food menu today...

Breakfast - poached egg and crumpet (5 points)
Lunch - ham salad wrap (4 points), yogurt (2 points) and dairylea dunker (3 points)
Dinner - fishfingers (5 points) mash (4 points) and peas (1 point)
Snacks - apple, mini oranges, ice pop (1 point)
Pudding - sugar free jelly and WW ice cream (1 point)

26/26

Have a great day everyone! X

Great News..... Finally Getting Clomid!!

I am so, so, so happy right now! After almost 2 very emotional years of TTC and countless tests we have finally been approved for Clomid!

I spoke to my fertility nurse this afternoon, who gave me the good news that a prescription will soon be on its way to me!

After putting down the phone I promptly burst into tears! Things are finally falling into place, I am feeling really good about this and hope this will finally give us our longed for BFP!

When we are finally holding a baby Hacker I don't think there will be a more loved or wanted child in the world.

I can't wait to get home and give my hubby a huge kiss! He has been amazing though everything!

I know we can't count our chickens yet and all that jazz, but I am feeling more positive than I have in months so I am just going with the feeling.

Fingers crossed eh?

Xxx

A Little Weight Loss Motivation...

I climbed back on the weight watchers wagon this week :-)

I AM GOING TO BE AT GOAL BY CHRISTMAS EVEN IF I HAVE TO CHOP A LIMB OFF!

Saw this brilliant poem on the community message board so thought I would share it. (not sure who the original author is to credit it).

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When you've eaten too much and you can't write it down, and you feel like the biggest failure in town.

When you want to give up just because you gave in, and forget all about being healthy and thin.

So what you went over your points a bit ? It's your next move that counts...So don't you quit !

It's a moment of truth, it's an attitude change. It's learning the skills to get back in your range.

It's telling yourself, "You've done great up till now; you can take on this challenge and beat it somehow."

It's part of your journey toward reaching your goal. You're still going to make it, just stay in control.

To stumble and fall is not a disgrace, if you summon the will to get back in the race.

But, often the struggler's, when loosing their grip, just throw in the towel and continue to slip.

And learn too late when the damage is done, that the race wasn't over... you still could have won.

Lifestyle change can be awkward and slow, but facing each challenge will help you grow.

Success is failure turned inside out, the silver tint in a cloud of doubt.

When you're pushed to the brink, just refuse to submit, if you bite it, you write it....But don't you quit.


Happy Wednesday Everyone! Xx

HSG......

After some issues with my last cycle, today I finally had my HSG examination. This is where a dye is injected through your cervix then your womb and fallopian tubes have an xray to check for problems.

This test sounds simple enough, right?

The leaflet I received told me to take painkillers before my appointment as the test can be "uncomfortable" and I can expect some cramping afterwards.

The leaflet was clearly written by someone under the influence of an epidural because it hurt like hell! Either that or it was written by man who did not possess a cervix and who's only experience of pain was a papercut!

I almost passed out and felt like I was going to throw up!

I had been told that everyone has different experiences with this test. It's not just about pain threshold, if you have ever been pregnant or had a coil fitted you would like feel less pain. (either that or I am simply a wuss!)

I don't want to freak out anyone who is waiting to have this test, because you honestly may have a completely different experience. Equally, I do not want to say "HSG? Just a tickle" because then when you have the test you will think I am a big fat liar! Lol

In fairness, while it was painful it was very, very quick and the cramping afterwards was no worse than period pain (and subsided after an hour or so).

The results....

They had encountered some "resistance" to the dye suggesting there was partial blockage. But the dye did eventually push through and the good news is my tubes are no longer blocked. The doctor advised some people can fall pregnant after having the test as the dye clears the tubes - fingers crossed! I am very lucky there wasn't any scar tissue or anything to cause a bigger blockage :-)

Now another waiting game.... We are getting good at this! I have to wait 2 weeks for the results to be "signed off" and put on the system for the fertility dept to review (why the depts can't just talk to each other is beyond me!).

Once they have done this we should hopefully get the green light for clomid! Yay!

I know I am constantly promising to be a better blogger, but the recent waiting game hasn't left much to tell you all. Now things are moving on I will try to update more often!

Xxxx

Must Do Better!

I haven't blogged since turning 30! Yes, it was that bad!..... Just kidding :-D

I have been really manic at work recently and my lifestyle has reflected that. Too many takeaways and crappy emotional eating lead to a 5.5lb gain at weigh in tonight! I hadn't been since 15th May so it could, in all honesty, have been worse!

I am back on the wagon starting tomorrow! I want to get back to my wedding weight by our 2nd anniversary on 17th September. 10lb to go!

On the fertility front, I have booked my HSG xray for 26th July. I will post again about this nearer the time, but essentially it is where they inject a dye into your cervix and then xray you to see whether your tubes are ok etc. Once I get the ok from this test I will be allowed the Clomid! Fingers crossed!

I promise to be a better blogger in future!

Xx

Life At 30

Well it happened, I turned 30 today. A milestone I have been dreading for weeks!

It's not because I think 30 is old, hell these days even 60 isn't seen as old anymore!

It's because I am not where I wanted to be by 30. I have the good job, the lovely home, an amazing husband so I am lucky in so many ways. The thing I wanted most was to be a mummy before I was 30 and it's a really crappy feeling that, despite everything, I haven't been able to make that happen.

I wouldn't even let my hubby buy me a present. I want to save the money so if we ever get there I can have a private scan and professional bump photos.

I have to speak to the fertility clinic this week for an update. Before the bank holiday we were told the second test gave an improved result so the nurse suggested they may try clomid for six months instead of running straight to IVF, but this needs approval from the lead consultant (which is what we are waiting for). He may decide that because of my age, and due to the results only being improved but still below normal, that we should stick with IVF. I will keep you posted.

I wanted to just hibernate today, but I am going to be strong, put on my happy face and enjoy the day xxx

An Article To Relate To...

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2102376/Baby-envy-The-new-social-divide.html